2010: THE YEAR ENDER POST

Ayun! SABOG na DAMDAMIN! (Lemme borrow this one, from Ms. Yeng ) That’s the right term to describe this indescribable feeling… Indescribable nga but I still got the term.. LOL. Anyways, here comes again the time of the month ( no! not the girl thing! Haha ), where in I’ve got to put everything that struck this clumsy yet strong headed girl in this Year ender Post!

Let me say that 2010, is more than just a roller coaster ride!

It was in the year 2010 where in Christina turns nineteen, probably the last year of having a ‘teen’ on her age ( Next year I’m turning TwenTEEN. LOL ). Well, who would have ever thought that the saddest month of the year would be also the month of my birthday? I was really struggling on almost everything… with my family… some of my friends… my faith…. My self…. Well cliché sounding? But you know what? Past is past, what we have now from the past are the thing that we had “learned”. Whether you lose or you win, at the end of the day the most important thing is that you fight for it and yes you surpassed it. 2010 also opens up a lot of new things to me… I and my family? We were drawn closer to each other. Although I know there’s no such thing as perfect. My friends? oh God how badly I was fooled and blinded searching for awesomeness to someone else’s but hey look who has the greatest friends in the world! Yep, ako yun! Haha… I’m not bragging, I just feel so blessed that I have the wackiest, craziest yet the sweetest friends in the world! I love both my Highschool and College friends. At siyempre, who also would have thought that I might be able to find true friends with totally strangers? Some may raise an eye from this but you know what I’m truly blessed that despite the inevitable danger of trusting people “on-line” I still found the coolest and the nicest people. I’m eagerly and positively hoping that someday we will meet each other. They’re the awesomest! I’m really thankful to God I have my family and friends. In 2010, My passion for music grew deeper, Well I guess not only with music but I think with the gift of Art itself. I know I will still be able to handle and develop my crafts in the coming years.

But one thing that truly inspires me a lot is that on this year, I somehow felt the importance of my existence, the reason why I’m living. It’s not all about how I end up being happy. It is more like being able to also make others happy. In year 2010, I feel God’s presence every single day. He was there especially when I was caught off guard about some crazy happenings that I don’t even know why it’s happening. Matagal na siyang kumakatok, and I tell you kapag papansinin mo lang, walang kapantay na ligaya at pag-asa ang hatid niya sayo.

I’m so thankful to God that although I don’t have the best of everything I still have my family, my friends, and some people whom I happen to know, people who take a part in my day to day life or those who had happen to come in my life.

Gaya nga ng pinaniniwalaan ko, lahat ng tao may connection sa bawat isa, yun tipo nga lang na makakasakay mo sa jeep may reason kung bakit sa dinamedame ng tao sa mundo siya yung makakasama mo.

2010 surely made me cry, laugh, just like anything that goes around. Although we have done a lot of mistakes, or even repeatedly done mistakes in our past years we still got the chance to make things right in the year 2011, we’ve got the rest of our lives to continuously learn. New Year does not always define ‘the end’ I guess it is better if we look at it as a “New Beginning” that means “New Hopes”.

I just want to share the message in one of the application I have at my Facebook.

….that if you relax, it comes. Don't seek, don't search, don't ask, don't knock, don't demand - relax. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, God shows you the way.

Surely in God’s plan and will, everything will gonna fall on its proper place. So I guess somehow it is good to slow down a bit.

To all my loved ones, beware I’m gonna love you all for the rest of my life! Haha…

Let us all rock out loud this coming new year!!!

God bless everyone!

Have a prosperous NEW YEAR.

~xtina

NEW BANNER

New Banner FTW! LOL :)

PARAMORE NO MORE: JOSH&ZAC OFFICIAL STATEMENT

Just recently we, Paramore fans were doomed by the sad news that Josh and Zac officially decided to leave the band Paramore. And yeah it was confirmed by Hayley, Taylor and Jeremy's official statement a couple of days ago. And now, finally to leave our mind at rest, why did the Farro brothers decided to leave the band, here is their official statement. (From JoshFarro 's blogspot)

Hey guys,

Let me start by apologizing to you for the way everything went down on Saturday. I had a statement typed ready to post to you guys but Hayley released one without my permission. We were not going to issue a statement until we worked out our exit agreement with Hayley. I wish it didn’t have to happen that way, Zac and I wanted to be the ones you heard it from. I want to be honest with you guys about how this band formulated from day one. I did not think Hayley’s version told the whole story, at least from our perspective and hopefully this will explain a bit about why we are leaving.

Zac and I had a garage band in high school with the intentions of just making music for the love of it. We met Taylor and our friend Jason Clark at our school and found out that we shared the same musical tastes. So, we asked them to join our band. It was some of the greatest times of our lives playing music in Taylor’s basement with them. We obviously needed a lead singer and one day Zac met Hayley. We asked her to come try out and eventually to join the band.

Months down the road things changed and this band became all about Hayley. She had a manager at the time that controlled her every move along with her parents. They didn’t like the idea of Hayley being in a rock band so they forced her to leave wanting her to pursue a solo career.

Hayley went off to write and record her solo demos while the four of us continued on without her. A couple of months later Hayley came and asked us if she could use the song “Conspiracy” that we had all previously written together. We agreed that that would be fine. I got a call a while after that from Hayley telling me that her manager said that Zac and I were invited to be back in the band (the band we started), but not Taylor and Jason because they weren’t good enough in his eyes. Hayley brought in Jeremy and our first rhythm guitarist Jason Bynum as the other two members.

We travelled to LA a few weeks later for a showcase and it was a nightmare. Hayley’s manager would tell the band to be in the lobby of the hotel at a certain time, but he and Hayley wouldn’t show for hours. We found out that they had been meeting with record label executives all morning without us, which is totally weird given that this wasn’t simply a solo artist, but we were a band. The band was in the dark the whole time. After many meetings between Hayley, her manager and the labels they decided to sign her to Atlantic records. We didn’t understand why Hayley was the only one signing the contract since we were told this was a “band”, but we were too young to grasp all of this. So far, Zac and I haven’t signed with another label, although I guess our part of Paramore sure could. Next thing we knew we were having a signing party for Hayley.

Our next move was to rerecord her solo demos with our own music rather than studio musicians to make it sound more genuine. Meanwhile, we tossed around band names. I wrote out a list of names, including “Paramore”, a name my old band with Taylor and Jason Clark had thought about using. Obviously, we settled on that name. The label received the rerecorded demos and once again tried to fire the entire band, saying we were terrible. Thankfully Hayley and I had been writing some new songs together (Hallelujah, Here We Go Again) that the label was pleased with so that acted as leverage for the band to stay. The label and management then decided to build our band up the grass-roots route. They put Hayley on Fueled by Ramen not making it known she was signed to Atlantic as well. All the while we still questioned whether or not we were an actual band, but Hayley continued to insist we were, despite our being ignored and pushed around by the label.

They then sent us all to Orlando to rehearse and write eight hours a day for our first record. Half -way though this process, Jeremy decided to quit. We were all really upset about it. So we finished the record, replaced Jeremy, and hit the road with Hayley’s father as our tour manager/driver of a twelve-passenger van. Her dad would constantly threaten to “pull the plug” on the whole band if we complained about anything, suggesting that we were hired guns and Hayley was the real artist, when in reality we were also part of the band. We’ve always been treated as less important than Hayley. It’s been obvious how her family views things.

Jeremy ended up rejoining and we toured non-stop for two and half years building our fan base, pretending to be a band that started naturally. In reality, what started as natural somehow morphed into a manufactured product of a major label, riding on the coattails of “Hayley’s dream.”

Before recording our next record, we kicked out Jeremy for his lack of work ethic and participation in things that Zac, Hayley and I didn’t agree with. At this point it was just the three of us to record Riot. Once the record was done, we needed a bassist and another guitarist. Eventually Zac and I convinced Hayley to let Taylor rejoin and she convinced us to let Jeremy back in, promising he had changed his ways.

Once again we hit the road and toured on our biggest record as a band. As you all know Hayley and I dated and broke up during this album cycle. Things then started going downhill for our band. Hayley and Jeremy’s views started changing from what we all once believed in. The band almost split after cancelling a tour in Europe, but we managed to keep it together somehow. This is when Zac and I started to consider quitting the band.

Once we finished touring on Riot, we came home for a break and started writing for Brand New Eyes. Hayley presented lyrics to us that were really negative and we didn’t agree with. For example, “the truth never set me free”, which contradicts what the Bible says in John 8:32 (“and you shall know the truth, and the truth shall sat you free”). We fought her about how her lyrics misrepresented our band and what we stood for, but in the end she got her way. Instead of fighting her any longer, we decided to just roll over and let it go.

Hayley claimed that this record reunited us as band and made us grow closer together, when in reality we were all growing further apart. Suddenly the band had spilt into two sides. Touring became more difficult since we couldn’t agree on anything. The friendships our band once had were no longer existent. Amos 3:3 says, “Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction”. In addition to the band turmoil, touring had really taken its toll on us both. We left home at such a young age and missed taking part in normal teenage years. When you own part of a band and are constantly playing, you make sacrifices. Touring has taken its toll on our family members as well. I specifically remember many moments where our parents would break down in tears when we had to leave. It broke my heart. Seeing our siblings grow up so much during our absences was never easy either.

After a lot a prayer and counsel Zac and I came to the decision that it was time to leave the band. We truly feel that God is leading us elsewhere and is going to do great things with us. The intention of this statement was not to belittle or disgrace the rest of the band, it was simply to clarify our decision for leaving and our desire to finally tell you guys the truth. We are still hoping to work out a friendly way to leave our part of Paramore intact with the remaining band members, including Hayley.

We want to thank you guys for all of your love and support over the past 7 years. It’s been an honor creating and playing music for you. If music is what God calls us to in the future, we hope that you all will be a part of it.

All of the glory be to God,

Josh and Zac

I just don't know which side am I gonna take now. But one thing for sure that I agree the most, "THE TRUTH WILL SET US FREE" :)

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Waaah..it's Christmas time!! Merry Christmas everyone! :)
To God be the Glory!
Happy Birthday Dear Jesus! :))

PARAMORE DISBANDING?

And I thought I will be able to watch them together live, I guess I have to turn down the thought of it, especially now that it is official; the Farro brothers has decided to leave the group. And it is so heartbreaking. :’(

Source/s: http://www.altpress.com/news/entry/josh_and_zac_farro_leave_paramore/

Well I guess paramore is not yet done, as Hayley along with Taylor and Jeremy stays and plans to continue what they have started, it was disappointing though that the Farro brothers decided to leave since they were the one who founded the band itself, well I guess as a fan, we must respect their decision.

Long live Paramore!

Honestly, can you believe we crossed the world while it's asleep?
I'd never trade it in, cuz I've always wanted this!
It's not a dream anymore! Ohhh..
It's not a dream anymore! It’s worth fighting for.

God knows the world doesn’t need another band, (whoo-oa, whooo-oa!)
But what a waste it would’ve been! (whoo-oa, whooo-oa!)
I can't believe we almost hung it up (whoo-oa, whooo-oa!)
We're just getting started (whoo-oa, whooo-oa!)

If you’re a paramore fan, you’ll definitely understand those lines clearly.. aww it really breaks my heart now! :'(

YENG CONSTANTINO ROCKS SUBIC

So this is it!

Finally last December 11, 2010 I was able to jump in along the crowd with my fellow Olangapeños as Yeng Constantino rock our night with her awesome show held at Night Market Subic! This is actually my second time seeing her performing live on stage. I just want to give my special shout out to my friends who were with me that night, Julie, Mhay, Kim and Ashley (lol), thanks guys you’re the sweetest! Thanks for accompanying me, sinamahan niyo pa rin ako kahit mild fan lang kayo ni Yeng! LOL.

We went to the venue as early as 7pm, because for sure lots of people would want to see Yeng so it is better if we save our spot, plus we still want to walk around at the theme park. My friends want it badly to ride ‘Taga Disco’ and I was like thinking if riding it would kill me. hehe.. I somehow see myself to the Korean girl whom I think almost died riding it. LOL. I still need to find some courage to ride it next time! LOL. So there after going around the theme park we headed back at the concert venue, we’ve found the perfect spot and somehow we felt delighted at the early shows they have, like singing contest and bikini pageant. Yep, Bikini pageant! Emphasize to the BIKINI… LOL. (para kasing di bagay diba… bikini pageant and rock show? Hmm.. haha) I’m so excited for Yeng to show up that night, well yun naman talaga pinunta namen dun right, not the bikini pageant… haha… so there good things comes to those who patiently waits, at 10:30pm I saw Morning Glory setting up on stage! It was my first time seeing the rest of the band.

And yeah, finally Yeng showed up!!! She was so gorgeous in her outfit! You’ll just have to love her “Jesus is my friend-shirt” plus her skull printed jacket (reminds me of Sunako.. hehe)! The crowd went wild as Yeng greeted us with her awesome performance of her very own hit song “time in”. The crowd just couldn’t help but to sing along. The next song she sang was My Girl’s OST, “Sabihin mo na”.

Yeng also shows her wacky side, as she delighted the crowd with her witty and funny spiels. I just love her spiels! While introducing her next song, who would have forgotten this line that night, I quote here (not verbatim though), “Yung next na kakantahin ko eh themesong ng isang teleserye na kung saan may isang babaeng seksi, parang ako lang…*laugh* … napakakinis at napakaganda… *crowd-cheers* nangangarap lang.. minsan lang yun eh.. pwede ba? *laugh* this is from.. DYOSA”. She also did some awesome renditions of phenomenal OPM songs such as "Magasin" and "Hinahanap-hanap Kita", from Eraserheads and Rivermaya respectively. I remember, she also sang “Laklak” though I really wish that she finish singing it, then OMO the next song was my favorite song “Jeepney Lovestory”, it was supposed to be her last song but the crowd insisted for “Hawak Kamay”. The crowd went singing as Yeng gratefully granted the request and sang the song that made who she is now or put her to where she is now as she said herself. This was actually my favorite part. One thing I really like about Yeng is that she never fails to praise God whenever she performs. Somehow I know this is the reason why God uses Yeng to inspire and to touch lives with just the way she is and through her music. It was indeed a splendid full of rock night that I will never forget. Like hello I’m a big fan here. :D She is truly an amazing performer with a big heart! I really couldn’t put it into words on how happy I am that night, that was an awesome early Christmas treat! Thank you papa God.

Here’s the Video:

here's another video, credit to the owner

“Di bale ng maging ASTIG, wag lang PASAWAY!” ~Yeng

Self Esteem

While others feel so highly conceited, you are busy looking down at yourself. You'll be fine with just the way you are.

Flaws everyone has it.

Self esteem -others might take it from you, but you know you'll always have the chance to take it back. You just have to learn to love and appreciate yourself. :)

Just a thought for a friend who always looks down to herself.

DREAM FOR REAL?

Hey let us talk about dreams today. Dreams are somehow the manifestation of suppressed feelings? Is it true? Well I guess, yes! LOL. Well, I dunno but I hope not. Why? Later on I’ll discuss that stuff. Last night I have embrace another weird dream. Weird in a sense, that I actually remember it right now, because most of the time, I always forgot what on earth I have dream about while I was sleeping. One more thing, I woke up with a happy smile. eeeeeee.. ♥

My dream was about this particular person… Hmm.. ‘guess who?’ LOL. Somehow in my life, I think I like him. (Hey I can see you’re smiling! Stop it, it’s not what you think it is! lol). You see, I rather choose gummy bears over him! Well-uhmm that was I thought before. WTF past tense Tina? What happen now? Seriously!! Si crazy bleep bleep ba ito? Dream on!!!Haha. Well seriously, the thing that got me talking about this stuff is that just last night, yeah last night, I have this weirdest and wackiest dream about this particular guy. Usually in real life he uses to hang out with a group, but in my dream? WTF he’s a freakin emo! I mean alone. Haha.. So there, He was actually sitting right next to me, while I’m busy copying lecture. (WTF emphasize to the FUDGE! He’s not even my classmate!!!! ) . We talked about ‘amplifier –stuff’. (Gaah.. pansin ko lang, I’m mixing up school lectures with almost everything in my life these past days…. Lol). He ask this blah blah.. I asked him blah blah blah.. (weird, how come he became so interested in amplifier?? Haha) . And that’s the end of a boring dream. Pardon me. That’s all what had happened, we just talked.

The weird thing is the feeling that I’ve got the moment I woke up while remembering this dream. I ain’t supposed to like the feeling, but damn I’m so happy. Ok, before, He was part of the crowd. Now, all of a suddenly, he’s the superstar! WTF, Idiomatic as it sounds, but that is pretty much of what had happened. I don’t know all of a suddenly I started feeling or acting this way. One thing for sure, it is because of this lousy and boring dream of mine. But why?? Kaya nga I’m asking, does dreams pertain to a suppressed feelings? If yes, how on earth did I ever managed to blind myself that much like I almost end up clueless on what I really feel. This is crazy, at the same time nausea!

Maybe I really like him from the start, It’s just that I’m too busy thinking how we can’t be together. Hmm.

TRANSISTOR TESTER SUBMISSION –EPIC!

I’m doing this to let myself somehow ease the feeling of disappointment I gained on this day. Ok so here’s what happen. We have to submit our project today, the last time I checked I was too damn confident about it. But to my dismay, on the last minute mine fails! I never anticipated that such thing would happen today… though this morning I have this weirdest thought of something ‘unwanted’ will happen this afternoon. Damn, I have a pretty accurate intuition, almost all of the time! So there, in my panicky appearance I rushed up and fixed it as fast as I could. I want also to take this chance to thank Kuya Drei, for helping us throughout this project. A better credit for him will be given on January 5, as I quote Lhei, “Kuya Drei, sa January 5 na lang.. sweldo ko yun!”. And this “Siyempre, malilimutan ko ba kayo Julie at Tinai, you guys will have to splurge my sweldo, eating everything you wish!” Obviously the latter is only a wishful thinking. So there, I somehow managed to fix it right on time then class starts. Our instructor welcomes the class with the thought that once again will have to build another project. This time, an amplifier. Yeah Big Time! The part that I hate the most came, checking of transistor. Actually I don’t even have the slightest idea that the checking of tester would be so brutal (haha.. sorry for the term.. kinda feel that way… or am I just exaggerating everything? LOL). First we have to check for the packaging. And oh yes, checking of it includes dropping it 12 inches high above the table, and I was like WTF? Do we really need to do that? I feel a sudden brush of cold chills runs up on my spine as I remember my case won’t fit, so it means screwing won’t help to make my tester’s case stable and sturdy. So when I dropped it.. kablam… it almost fell open, and I’ve got this heartbreaking words form our instructor. “Christina… ayusin mo yan…. Hindi properly mounted yung case..” she exclaimed in her disappointedly tone of voice. It feels heartbreaking because as much as I hate to be disappointed I also hate disappointing someone. I know she have given us more than enough time to accomplished this and yet it turn out to be so disappointing. Luckily somehow, mine’s works properly, checked some of the transistors and it works properly. I’m just so disappointed with the packaging though, no matter how much I’ve tried to fix it, the top and back case won’t just fit together. So there, it wasn’t sturdy and I end up fixing it with the aid of scotch tape. WTF? The class suddenly turns into a crazy environment, as I’m not the only one cramming to fix our own testers.


I am very very disappointed especially to myself. I know I could have done better. Sabi ko nga kay Julie, maarte ako (good way though! Lol)! Yet I end up being contended only on the standard, or worse.. the worst! I’ve learned a thing today, “Hindi sapat ang “pwede na”, in everything we do, we must give our best. On the irony of the fact that no one is perfect I guess we must face another fact that being almost close to perfection is also an option, yes it is indeed possible. And also one more thing, you will never know when and where twist of fate comes. Petty as it may seem, I guess it is something like just like what had happened to me today, I was caught of guard because I never anticipated that this will happened.

Traumatic or just a mere exaggeration, it’s up to you. For me, I set my own standards and simple school projects means a lot to me, because I know I will get the benefit of being a responsible person someday from this.

To lighten up the epicness of this day, I along with my friends decided to sit down and talked about it at Mcdo. I feel revived somehow after splurging coke float, and eating fries. And most especially goofing around with the weirdest yet the awesomess( if there’s such word!) creatures in town.. Lhei and Julie 

Anyhoo… just to bury the “I must not tell what is to be bury-haha”
We all worked hard and do our own stuff, it is too much if you just ignore the blessing that is given to you, if there is such, bonus yun. Better yet use it in a way that will lead you to grow into a better person. You have the choice whether you abuse it or not. You see, It takes more than a lifetime to fully know someone. In electronics I’ve learned that the best way to conduct current is in forward bias, because the depletion decreases, same principle applies in real life, the more you let a positive and another positive to work out, the greater the possibilities you will decrease the gap and fill in the missing holes… gap can pertains to the gap itself in achieving your goals while holes can be something that is missing in your life.


To Julie and Lhei, you guys has the slightest Idea about the last paragraph noh? *smirk* -FYI, its sarcasm

TRANSISTOR TESTER PROJECT DAY 2 3 4… WTF? I’M COUNTING!

LOL.. excuse me for my title.. haha.. I lost everything.. everything about this documentation… well not really everything I mean I just lost my time updating the whole stuff about this project in which I originally plan to document. Ok ‘nuff said. Let’s continue and finish this thing that I started. So actually right now, I’m done with my transistor tester. Yeah like almost a week ago. Here’s what I have done.


I'll post the picture of the finished product after I transfer it into my computer. I'm too damn lazy to transfer it now. LOL.



A wise approach regarding building a project was to make sure you stick with good decisions. Just like in real life, one wrong decision can lead you to your ass whooping nightmares. So just to make thing sure, I started my project by building it first using bread board. Some say that that was just a plenty of work to be done, like that would be just a waste of time. But I tell you, it does save up money! LOL. Once you soldered everything to the PCB you can always desoldered it but I bet that it will never satisfy you! So ok, after doing the breadboard thing I had found out that I bought or should I say they sell to me a wrong IC! WTF! (Someday, I’m gonna buy my own electronics shop that will provide everything a consumer needed. LOL. Including cakes and pastries? Wtf weirdo? LOL). Luckily, my classmates were more willingly to help. They provide us the testers’ case (packaging) and yeah the IC. Big thanks! :) And of course yeah good thing I have bread board everything first. Oh Gawd, it saves me from buying all the parts again after finding out that I've got the wrong IC.

After checking out that the whole circuit was working, I along with some of my classmates decided to work on it at my place. Thank God it went ow so good. And yeah taddaah.. We’re all finished!




Here’s the schematic diagram and the part list:
Credit to ALEXAN. 







Just follow it carefully and you can also be able to build yourself a transistor tester. :D


That would be all I guess.. :D

HE IS WE MY FOREVER ALBUM

OMO!!!! HE IS WE will release their very first album on Nov 23! Finally the long wait is almost over! I'm so excited! :D

My Forever Tracklisting:
1. Forever And Ever
2. All About Us (featuring Aaron Gillespie)
3. Everything You Do
4. And Run
5. Happily Ever After
6. Kiss It Better
7. Prove You Wrong
8. Blame It On The Rain
9. Love Life
10. Fall


check out the carrier single here:
http://www.purevolume.com/HEISWE




SOURCE: http://www.absolutepunk.net/showthread.php?t=2020332

DAY 1 : TRANSISTOR TESTER PROJECT

OK, So I'm planning to put up a documentation thing for our electronics 2 project in which we were asked to make our own transistor tester. This documentation is just a random thing that I always do whenever I feel like doing. huh? LOL. Anyways, as a half diligent and half lazy electronics student... or maybe 1/4 diligent only.. lol. I prefer to spice up the pressure I feel whenever a project was given to me, spicing up means adding more extra activities to the typical or let me say to the mundane ways of accomplishing a given task or the project itself. And this is what I do.LOL. Actually there are still several things I do just to lessen the pressure. I will mention some of it later on.

Ok, let's start now the project.

Day 1:

I found several good schematic diagrams for our transistor tester at the internet. One of the best was this.

Credit to the owner :

http://www.electronicecircuits.com/electronic-circuits/in-circuit-transistor-tester/

I'm too lazy to include the schematic diagram here. LOL. Anyhoo, I recommend this schematic diagram for beginners like me. We manage to canvass the parts and so far, only the 9 volt battery and the IC are the money suckers. Approximately Php 275 for this project.

Ow i forgot to mention, our instructor gave us also sample copy of a transistor tester schematic diagram including the part list and the procedures.

I will scan and post the said copy on the next post. Please bare with me.


Actually I find this one cheaper than the 275php project I mention before ( the one i provided with link). Let's take for example the IC cost 28php only as compare to the 68php(IC's price or any other parts varies depends on the part number/type i supposed.) Plus the fact that "instructions" and "procedures" are included and since it is commercially available, I've chosen this one. I actually bought some of the important materials or parts of it. Later on, I will start to build it on the bread board. I will post updates soon as I accomplish a thing.

So i guess that's it for Day 1.

btw, submission of this project will be after our foundation day. Gee.. the clock is ticking... I have more than a week to finish this... tsk tsk..

Aja! Fighting! LOL.

DREAM

Last night when I was about to sleep, I had a wonderful conversation with my brother. It was a typical brother and sister sharing stories at first. Like we talked about our daily lives then also we talked about our similar interest like about some public figures, things we wish to accomplish… things from our past. It was indeed a great conversation. Then all of a suddenly, we talked about our religion. I don’t know but whenever I have a chance to have a heart to heart conversation with my brother we somehow always end up talking about our beliefs. It was in the middle of conversation when suddenly I was hit by a memory of my dream from the past. I have told him about this dream before, and the last thing I remembered the first time I told him about this dream was that I was shaking and crying. I didn’t actually anticipate that all of suddenly I will feel the same last night. Kakaiba nga lang last night kasi somehow I manage to remember pa some of the details sa dream ko na hindi ko naman naalala before. I don’t know if someone can interpret this, I myself is confuse about it. I dreamed about this long time ago… siguro couple of months na rin ang lumipas, basta it was when my mom was sick, the moment which I can say the toughest battle for us. Here’s what happened to my dream.

“ I was with my friends that day, basta ang alam ko magugood time lang kame… kaso nagulat ako kasi yung pinuntahan namen parang mall pa lang na itinatayo… one thing that bothers me is that bigla na lang nawala ang mga friends ko sa scene kasi nilibot ko yung lugar mag-isa. Hanggang ngayon nararamdaman ko pa kung ano yung nararamdaman ko that time, kinakabahan at the same time confuse. Kasi yung lugar parang lumang simbahan na tinibag or ginigiba. Makikia mo yung mga upuan sa simbahan wala sa ayos, sira sira sabay parang abandoned na talaga yung lugar. Tipong nirerenovate na nga. Basta may nakausap ako dun, di ko na masyadong maalala pero sure ako ginagawang mall yung lugar na yun. Hindi ko na lubos maalala kung ano ang mga sumunod na nangyari. Ang naalala ko lang muli, eh nasa ibang lugar na naman ako, this time parang hospital di ko sure kasi para rin naman siyang simpleng apartment kung saan tanaw mo ang kalsada kapag sumilip ka sa malaking bintana. Nasa second floor iyon. Sa labas tanaw mo yung mga jeep na dumadaan. Sa may bandang gilid may matatanaw kang isang vendor ng ahas. Malinaw pa saken kung panu siya magbenta ng ahas, tumatawid tawid sa kalsada at iniaalok ang ahas… tapos maya maya sa di kalayuan may mga pulis na lumapit sa kanya… hindi ko lubos maintindihan pero parang hinuhuli ata siya? Ewan ko ang gulo. Tiyaka ko na lang muling ibinaling ang tingin ko sa loob nung mismong silid kung saan ko tinatanaw yung gulo sa labas. Duon sa kwarto hindi naman ako nagulat sa aking nakita… basta ang tanging naaalala ko lang na nararamdaman ko that time eh malungkot at nagsusumamo dahil sa kwartong iyon nakita ko si Jesus, nakahiga sa kama. Ang itsura ni Jesus eh yung itsura niya sa crucifix. Duguan ang buong katawan. May sakit siya nun at hinang hina. Mejo di pangkaraniwan ang kanyang laki. Malaki compare sa pangkaraniwan. Nakita ko rin dun na ginagamot siya ng Doctor. Actually yung doctor na gumagamot kay Jesus eh yung doctor rin na gumagamot kay mama during the time na nahospital ito. Hindi ko na maalala kung sino yung kasama kong nakabantay nung mga sandaling iyon. Basta alam ko malungkot ako. Sa ngayon hindi ko na talaga maalala ang iba pang pangyayari…”

Nahihiwagaan lang ako talaga sa panaginip kung ito. Madalas din akong makapanaginip ng may kaugnayan sa simbahan. Ewan ko kung bakit. Kakaiba talaga ang dating saken ng panaginip kong ito, kasi everytime na naaalala ko ito, nanlalambot at nanginginig ang buong katawan ko. Hindi ko maipaliwanag kung bakit. My brother just told me to pray about it. Sabi niya in time maliliwanagan din ako, wag daw akong matakot… Just pray. Sa tingin ko nga yun ang the best na dapat kung gawin. And besides alam ko kahit anu pa man ang mangayari kagustuhan yun ng Diyos…

I thought I might share this dream to you guys, I just don’t know exactly kung anu yung significance nito. Whether for future or something I have to look upon myself. Siguro one thing. We must be ready, maging handa sa lahat ng posibilidad, sa isang iglap may pwedeng mawala may pwedeng magbago, at siguro para saken hindi lang sapat ang humanap ng happiness mas mabuti kung magampanan mo yung purpose mo sa mundo.

And I just also want to include this prayer from Mama Mary’s FB page:

Dear Lord, I thank you for this day. I thank You for my being able to see and to hear this morning. I'm blessed because You are a forgiving God and an understanding God. You have done so much for me and You keep on blessing me. Forgive me this day for everything I have done, said or thought that was not pleasing to you. I ask now for Your forgiveness.
Please keep me safe from all danger and harm. Help me to start this day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude. Let me make the best of each and every day to clear my mind so that I can hear from You.

Please broaden my mind that I can accept all things. Let me not whine and whimper over things I have no control over. Let me continue to see sin through God's eyes and acknowledge it as evil. And when I sin, let me repent, and confess with my mouth my wrongdoing, and receive the forgiveness of God.

And when this world closes in on me, let me remember Jesus' example -- to slip away and find a quiet place to pray. It's the best response when I'm pushed beyond my limits. I know that when I can't pray, You listen to my heart. Continue to use me to do Your will.

Continue to bless me that I may be a blessing to others. Keep me strong that I may help the weak. Keep me uplifted that I may have words of encouragement for others. I pray for those who are lost and can't find their way. I pray for those who are misjudged and misunderstood. I pray for those who don't know You intimately. I pray for those who don't believe. But I thank you that I believe.

I believe that God changes people and God changes things. I pray for all my sisters and brothers, for each and every family member in their households. I pray for peace, love and joy in their homes that they are out of debt and all their needs are met.

I pray that every eye that reads this knows there is no problem, circumstance, or situation greater than God. Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight. I pray that these words be received into the hearts of every eye that sees them and every mouth that confesses them willingly.. AMEN.

Me cleaning? equals to damaged!

NOV. 3, 2010

Thought I may share this EPIC story.. lately this afternoon… I feel like cleaning the computer… So there, got my cleaning stuff and screw. First I started polishing the monitor. Wow, kinda looks new. Job well done! Then there go the speakers and the cd’s. Now they’re properly organized! I was about to finish cleaning up, then suddenly I saw the keyboard. Yah right I forgot the keyboard… so I unplugged the cords and started cleaning the keyboard. Being a little too perfectionist, I find it hard to resist the inevitable dust inside the keyboard due to the fact that I was only able to cleaned the outer part. So with certainty, I picked up the screw and start to disassemble the keyboard. Never in my life have I ever done this before, but does it matter to a risk taker like me? I wasn’t even thinking that I could damage this thing! lol. I slowly lifted the back lid of the keyboard, and to my surprised, I saw pieces falling apart! And I was like, ok.. so this is what it looks like… and uhhmm what the hell is this? What the hell I have done just by now? I actually felt a sudden twirl in my stomach, guess kinda nervous. But then, with a pretty optimistic head, I continued my cleaning… I was confident somehow that I could easily assemble it once I was finish cleaning. Then.. I was wrong… really really WRONG! WTF? The keyboard wasn’t working! So I opened it up again, trying my best to fix it, but hell for the second time, it wasn’t working! I have no one to blame but myself! Huhu… and for the third time… reassembled it… TADAAAAHHH… A B C DHDEKHJSOHKJSLRHJ;LSR,VUIMYMBYP[MOJI[B’PN Yeah its working! Finally I fixed it. But into my dismay… Some keys aren’t working.. aww… All keys were fine except for the number keys which has the symbols… damn! Can’t you believe that my exclamation point was a copy-paste!! ! ! ! arrr! ! and I was like hitting letter W as hard as I could! Ow.. I messed up my keyboard! wth! I’m thinking if I will reassemble it tomorrow again, but I’m afraid I might worsen the problem… Anyhoo.. I think I should try my luck and my best tomorrow. Like I don’t even have a choice, I can’t live without this thing »» “!!!”

So there you go… Cleaning is not my forte.. tsk tsk…

http://worthtaker.tumblr.com/post/1471207474/me-cleaning-equals-to-damaged

YOUTUBE HD PART 3 -EPIC FAIL

Just when i thought i won't be having anymore issues with f***** youtube! gaaahh! This wasn't even strike two! this is so damn strike three for a week!!!! crap crap crap!!! Well this is beyond pet peeves anymore! Grabe! The issue? Ok, so I finished my project for this week, not to brag but I did a great job about it! Then right now youtube is really making me nuts tonight, cause hell I can't upload! WTF? I'm through with this at FB video application, and now on my youtube too? owgawd! so pissed so pissed so pissed!!! Please fixed this highly trained monkeys.. ASAP!

I'm reserving good vibes for tomorrow! and now what? hmp! SWAN TINA! :L

YOUTUBE HD PART 2

ang artie artie ng youtube! haha...well I've realized na in order for your videos that's in epic HD videos to be uploaded in HD epic video also in youtube, you just have to make sure that your output video format should be in .mp4! Confusing ehh? before I used to upload videos at .wmv file(yeah, the times when I'm stuck in Windows Movie Maker) and it turned out to be as good as the raw file. But I must say, in Sony Vegas it is a different story! Well this is only hypothetically speaking, but I've done my part, I've conducted a test where in I set a 14 seconds video clip into a standard HD format. Then set my template into which I could have an output .mp4 format (in w/c it was in HD too). Then I uploaded it on Youtube! WAALLLAAA! It's smooth and sailing! (just like most sony vegas HD videos!). So polished! No freaking hell lags!

You think you've heard it all? wrong! Again just to prove that my theory was getting on the right track, I've tried to convert my HD video ( that was save in .wmv format, the one I uploaded on Youtube that end up low quality HD because of the lags wtf?!) into standard Iphone/PSP format which is in .mp4. Guess what? Boom! I'm on the right track, it turned out that it was the same laggy thing! ( I didn't bother to watch the video because it was in an epic laggy state same to the one i uploaded to YT! ). And hell it was lately that I realized that when you upload video with any video format in Youtube, it will be automatically converted into .mp4 (thus downloading using youtube downloader will prove that!) I know right because whenever I downloaded video from youtube it was always in .mp4 format!

So with that I think that the main source of the problem was on the way I save my project. Again Tina it should be in HD mp4! Less stress because the output smoothness of your final video will be the same as the one uploaded in youtube.

Well I should recommend that youtube monkeys (as they've called themselves) must at least do something about this format compatibility thing. Some youtubers also got tons of problems like their vid was out of synch, upload error.. etc.

Anyhoo, I'm not so sure whether my theory is right. But somehow, I think that was really the problem. I'm documenting this whole thing just to make sure that I will never get lost again in Youtube! And maybe someone will find this post helpful as well! haha...

Dang can you believe that the whole TEST was like out of SERENDIPITY? :) Lucky enough right? haha.. )

YOUTUBE IN HD

so ok.. I'm into this Pinoy Teleserye now! (which is kinda unusual because I've never ever got hooked with any Pinoy teleserye before), that's why I created a new fan vid. And also, i created this fanvid using my new video editing software, Sony Vegas. ( it reminds me of the very painful moment when I met photoshop! two words, NOSE BLEED! They're like the softwares that would make you point and click your mouse browser at the X button several times! *sighed* Hard to deal with at first then later on you'll love to use, like what else could i say. I'm in love with photoshop). Ok back to the real thing, I'm not posting this video to promote or something, it's just that YOUTUBE really pissed me off today! Like hell, i uploaded this video in HD, and yeah i've got this video uploaded in youtube in HD too but.. BUT.. it's freakin' laggy! Like its freezing for every blur transition. In which I believe my Sony Vegas was purely innocent. Because I've got my video's soft copy, smooth and yeah on its epic HD quality! So I'm wondering why on earth this could happen? *sighed* I'm really pissed youtube, Don't tell me it is another bug! Damm*t clean your system for the good of all mankind! ( ok I'm exaggerating! ) . FYI, I'm quite perfectionist that's why small things like this pisses me off that much. :L

I love youtube, at ang sakit sakit na! pwe! (one more chance?lol)

WHY I DON’T HATE JUSTIN BIEBER

Baby baby noooooo…. Awesome!

 

Ok, so this blog post is especially dedicated to JB believers. Actually I’m just a mild fan of Justin Beiber. I like most of his songs. And I don’t care if most people hate his voice, for me it’s so cute and at the same time he really can sing! Other Talents? He can play the piano, drums and the guitar… I bet even some of the grownups couldn’t do that! One more thing JB is so freakinly gorgeous guy!

 

If the things I’ve stated above doesn’t please you that much.

Let us dig deeper to what really matters.

Justin started just like any people who are aiming for their dreams.

First you’ve got to believe into yourself….even if others don’t.

 

at this video.. Little JB sings his heart out despite the inevitable laughs coming from the crowd.

 

Comment from youtube:

“Whether people think he sucks or not, still gotta give him props for still performing when people in the crowd were laughing at him. Not many people that age would have done what he did.” ~SirBigDICKNigga

 

Follow your dreams, it doesn’t matter if you fail a couple of times the thing is you keep on trying and never looses hope.

 

You know what I really like about Justin Bieber is that even at his young age he already fulfilled one of his biggest dreams, and I know he deserves it. Every fruits that came from our “hard work” and “determination” I believe we all deserve it.

ENROLLMENT THINGY!

Hello. Yay, finally end of the first semester! Partey partey! Lol. Ok so I just want to share some stories. Here’s what happened… Day 1 Monday… along with my friends, we have decided to go to school and enroll for the coming second semester, unfortunately we canceled our plans due to the bad weather condition. It’s raining cats and dogs for good all sake! So I end up stuck at home. Second day follows the same. I was so bored that day that I almost end up eating paper! Char! ( …truth is I just can’t finish my artworks! It makes me so crazy!!! Arr) Other pet peeve that day was the power interruption. Again no access to the world wide web.. (that sucks bigtime!) So I just stayed at home and read some of the English novels that my dad gave to me. It was a relieved that somehow I feel fine reading those. I’ve finished two books in just one sitting. The next day, we have decided to finally go to school and enroll. It feels good to see some of the familiar faces. Engineering classmates and schoolmates, I just don’t know how in particular this thing happens but every time I see them I feel happy maybe because people that I often see grows on me, (and they’re like trees that grows on me as tall as the tree of knowledge in plants vs. zombies could grow.. char!lol… ) well except for my crush..lol…he’s different! He’s not just growing, with his presence I feel like I’m a climate change, sad mood suddenly turns to be happy, corny! It’s pretty obvious cinnamon! Do I need to explain myself here? Lol),. But one thing that truly amazed me was seeing my funny, wackiest and ahmm.. Well-behave friends! Gawd, they’re the coolest creatures! LOL. (Enough na nga baka ma-overwhelmed masyado.. mag-hyperventilate pa yang mga yan eh.. lol.).

Can you believe that we didn’t accomplish the whole enrollment stuff that day that we need to go back the following day! *sighed* so here’s what happened on the day that follows, Again along with the well behave creatures (oh my god.. I’m choking!! Hellpp… haha) we came back at school and finally finished enrolling. Then I got home so early to finish my artworks. I prefer staying at home than hanging outside just saying. 


So that’s the boring enrollment thingy, haha…

I’m not so sure on what’s gonna happen with this coming second semester ( yeah I supposed, like anu ako fortune teller?), but of course I bet there would be some endless “Hayy naku… waaahh.. exam na naman…” lines! Like who the hell wants exams nowadays? What else, I guess one thing that I’m looking forward to is probably just like what I have said on my early post ( see SCHOOOLING INTERRUPTING MY EDUCATION THING) … Second Semester marks a new beginning, so we should work our ass off better than before, Schooling is essential for our education so we should make the most out of it! And yeah, Schooling is much much much fun with the people around who always cheer you up! And remember the law of attraction guys! Negative feelings always attract negative happenings! So stay positive! Good vibes for the Win! ) It’s time to kick some ass! Woot!! )

1ST SEM IS ALMOST OVER!!! WHAT'S NEXT?

MY SCHOOLING IS INTERFERING WITH MY EDUCATION! I know, that line wasn’t originally from me. I actually first heard it from Youtube’s Blogger Dan Brown. But I know for sure, that somehow that is exactly my point of view regarding my present education. Some of my friends told me that maybe I’m just bored, bored of studying… but WTF??? How can you feel bored if your future is at stake! Hell no! I’m not just simply bored of the way things are happening around the school, it’s just that I’m not that satisfied and it is so disturbing! I can’t even pass a day without thinking about it!

To the reader I want you to know how I am just being honest to myself, I’m not writing all this stuff because I have a traumatic experienced with either one of my profs or worst having something against my school or to anyone! THIS IS AN HONEST OPINION from a student who lately feel that SCHOOLING IS ACTUALLY INTERFERING HER EDUCATION! THIS SOUNDS CRAZY!

I dunno when and how this thought came up to me. It’s just that I woke up one day, went to school, and on my way to school suddenly I gave in to a thought, I was wondering, how and why everyday seems like a “replay”. Like you need to wake up and avoid being late… ( yes.. I suck on being on time! I’m always late! Arrr! Hate you Tina!) go to school, study some of the lessons your “instructor” instructed you to read but barely given you time for them to discussed it on class! WTF? Some will actually teach their students, yes that’s good, but what isn’t right is that they just give you an hour or so for a “talk-the-blah-blah-blah-and-let-the-student-understand-only-what-they-could-understand!”. What I mean is the traditional ways of learning! Like you sit in a class, you start to listen then scribble some of the notes written at the blackboard by your teacher. This way of learning is so passive! Yes some questions from the students were actually answered, but some was like, “ OK? And that’s for you to find out! Go on the library and do your research!” WTF?
It is as the old saying that goes, “Give a man a fish, and he'll eat for a night. Teach a man to fish, and he'll eat for a lifetime”. Having knowledge and knowing how to use it are two completely different things. Schools should not simply give facts to students, they should teach them to use the facts. The education system for me I think fails at the latter.
I’ve been into a class were in I just sat for like an hour or so then started getting confuse rather than absorbing the new concepts or ideas about what my professor was trying to teach us, not because I’m dumb, it was because I have honestly no idea about what my professor was talking about in the first place, and I supposed when we learn new things, first thing to do is to introduced it itself and I believe the professor miss that part! They tend to give us facts yet they fail to teach on how we could use it! In my own native tongue, “Kulang kulang ang turo ni ma’am or ni sir… sabi ko nga.. minsan ang pagtuturo.. parang chismis yan eh.. minsan kahit totoo na yung chismis eh kung kulang magiiba ng definition! Oh chismis nga Diba?” It is not enough to leave it all to the part of the student, learning is hand to hand system.
Schooling could have been exciting if everyday each students becomes so enthusiastic regarding their studies, and we could have got to that point only if we established “productive-ways” of learning! Like students will be able to have at least experience the touch of the “actual-thing” or the reality itself about their chosen career!
I’ve been in electronics engineering course for years but still I’m so sad because I feel unequipped about the area of my chosen career. Its not just about the school or the professor to blame, I admit as a student I’ve committed mistakes. It’s just that lately I’ve realized that there are actually so many ways to improve my “schooling”.
And now as the first semester has reached its end a new chapter is ready to open. Hello second semester! Haha. As for my friends, classmates and schoolmates or to everyone who think they must do the same, I encourage you all to start this coming semester with a bang! It’s not just about going to school. Let’s make it more like going to school for learning and for “my education”. As we all know schooling is essential in order for us to have a better education, so we just can’t simply give it up because we’re bored or unsatisfied, in fact we must make it more like us. I know sounds confusing and ridiculous somehow but what I mean is that we should make our schooling more interesting in our own ways. Focus on the things that will make us equipped and will help us to face the battle grounds of real world. And remember we don’t have to make all things perfect, but I think there’s no harm in trying. It’s better than doing nothing.

So smile lang tayo… take optimism at its best! Embrace your inner weirdness!

WELL DONE IS MUCH BETTER THAN WELL SAID! So let’s make it happen! Go Tina!!!! Haha.. ( 5 stars for Christina! Maybe she has taken her optimism vitamins! Lol)

HAYLEY WILLIAMS V.S. YENG CONSTANTINO

Ok just a random blog about these two great singers. Recently or should I say yesterday, I encountered this so called “hate posts to Yeng Constantino” coming from an obviously Paramore fan (where Hayley is the lead vocals). She/He said that Yeng copies Hayley Williams and she’s/he’s very sure ‘bout it and I was like WTF?? That’s when it all started, believe it or not, my inner weirdness works once again, lol. I started to ask myself, why do people always tend to compare almost everything? Well the very reason that pops out in my mind is that people set standards for their selves. So true? I know right, I myself too. But what I mean about setting this “standards” is that it gets so mundane that when they actually get stuck with it and something “better” or almost the same as it is comes along, they started to have closed eyes and closed ears. In short, they become closed minded! Take my words, I’ve learned it trough the best mentor in town, “my experience”.



Anyways let’s go back to Yeng and Hayley. I’ve been a fan of Ms. Yeng Constantino since the day I insist myself to watch local station (Yeah, I’m a Disney kid! And now growing up sucks!!!! Lol ). There I was able to watch a reality TV show entitled “Pinoy Dream Academy”, at first I wasn’t so fond to it, not until I saw this guy name Jun Hirano (WTF? What happen to Yeng?lol.. wait just a sec… ). He’s so cute and he sings very great. Days past and I started to get hooked with the show. Then all of a suddenly the participants of the said reality show was given a chance to sing their own composition, and the very moment I heard the line… “Minsan madarama mong kay bigat ng problema….” Damn I don’t know but it was like I’m in love with the song the very first time I’ve laid my ears on it! Yes it was Yeng’s “Hawak Kamay”. Actually that song saves me! From then on I rooted for Yeng Constantino to win! And yes she won! And up to now I continue listening to her music. The feeling I’ve got from listening to her songs, word by word…. Damn I tell you that’s priceless!




Now let’s go on with Hayley Williams. Actually before the band Paramore get into the mainstream, I’m actually a fan! Well thanks to a highschool friend of mine, (hey Erica!!) who introduced them to me. She knew that I’m fond to rock and alternative songs so she let me borrow her Paramore cd’s. The very first song I heard was “Misery Business” and I remember I told myself, this is what you call music! Lol. Then boom, I became a paramore fan. I started to browse some of their songs and some facts about them through the internet… and I feel like I did the greatest discovery of my life ever since! Lol.

So you see, I really should know if Yeng imitates Hayley, because I’m a fan of both. For me they have their own unique style not just in singing but also with their character. Maybe if we talk about similarities, one common thing we could get is that, both are great and awesome singers who make great music for us.

Music means a lot to me.
Music is like the Air, without it I’ll die.

I’m so thankful for Yeng and Hayley for the great music. Both are epitome of awesome soulful musicians!

A Sad and Love Story

*share :))


There was once this guy who is very much in love with his girl. This
Romantic guy folded 1,000 pieces of paper cranes as a gift to his girl. Although, at that time he was just a small fry in his company, his future doesn't seemed too bright, they were very happy together. Until one day, his girl told him she was going to Paris and will never come back. She also told him that she couldn’t visualize any future for the both of them, so they went their own ways there and then... Heartbroken, the guy agreed. But when he regains his confidence, he worked hard day and night, slogging his body and mind just to make something out of him. Finally with all these hard work and the help of friends, this guy had set up his own company… You never fail until you stop trying. One rainy day, while this guy was driving, he saw an elderly couple sharing an umbrella the rain walking to some destination. Even with the umbrella, they were still drenched. It didn't take him long to realize those were his girl's parents. With a heart in getting back at them, he drove slowly beside the couple, wanting them to spot him in his luxury sedan. He wanted them to know that he wasn't the same anymore; he had his own company, car, condo, etc. He made it! Before the guy can realize, the couple was walking towards a cemetery, and he got out of his car and followed...and he saw his girl, a photograph of her smiling sweetly as ever at him from her tombstone and he saw his paper cranes beside her... Her parents saw him. He asks them why had this happened. They explained, she did not leave for France at all. She was ill with cancer. She had believed that he will make it someday, but she did not want to be his obstacle... therefore she had chosen to leave him. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. She had wanted her parents to put his paper cranes beside her, because, if the day comes when fate brings him to her again...he can take some of those back with him...Once you have loved, you will always love. For what's in your mind may escape but what's in your heart will remain forever. The guy just wept...The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can't have them ...........hope u understand. Find time to realize that there is one person who means so much to you, for you might wake up one morning losing that person who you thought meant nothing to you.

I QUIT.

"Sometimes we just have to know, WHEN TO QUIT"

Many times i 've tried to be tough...I've tried to learned the hard way..... Sometimes I'm always caught off guard... the reason I became too weak, the reason why I'm in denial, the reason why i assumed and end up so disappointed.

Tonight. Though i dunno if i can stand this but sure thing i just want to quit. Quit this thing. I have my whole life to do this thing i guess. Good Vibes nga sabi nila.

I dunno why, but i find it very brave to admit my defeat.
I guess looking at the positive aspects of your life will definitely make you a better person... So true...Somehow i feel relieved..

I'm so thankful that even if i lost this battle still i'm able to look at the bright things that this thing had given me.

Thank God. No more escape. No more fake smiles. Just a new smile defined by HOPE, CHANGE and OPTIMISM.

I will definitely miss the days...

HARD, PAINFUL, YET THIS IS WHAT YOU CALL RIGHT.

goodbye.
Tonight, I'm closing a chapter in the book that contains the story of my life.

I LOST. I QUIT.

NEXT CHAPTER?
Hmm.. i guess sad endings sometimes lead to new happy beginnings. who knows, maybe next chapter isn't that so bad. haha...

SCREW FACEBOOK!

"Your account is temporarily unavailable due to site maintenance. It should be available again within a few hours. We apologize for the inconvenience."

Seriously, just when i thought i could have a break and start doing things on FB, well that note appears and it ruined everything! Screw on you FB! Anyways, Please fix this ASAP. I badly need to see some important messages from my page.. huhuhu.... please please.. i didn't kill anybody.. why on earth you have done this to me!!!! >O.A

TOYSTORY3

Juvenile as it may look like.. but this movie made me cry! *sniff-sniff*. We all grow up! But moving on is just like the hardest part of it! Sometimes we must let go of something from the past in order for us to keep moving forward.

A TEAM

“Individual commitment to a group effort" My motto for the Win! I'm not lacking with consideration...or understanding... I JUST CAN'T TAKE OF ANYMORE THAT IS TOO MUCH! Cause if i do.. then its beyond stupidity! I'll work my ass off, not only for myself.. but for the group! Hope everyone will do the same!

Some of the thoughts. Some Blogblahblah.

Isn’t it really so tiring? I mean all this time all I do is to think of the things that I could possibly do. Things that I’ve really wanted long enough to do! Things that some kind of impossible. I guess I’m not that so sick about it…. A little I guess. I just couldn’t start to finish the race. The more I think about it, the harder it gets for me to handle it. I want a sweet perfection.. (please Cris.. let me have this line for a while).

I’m giving you thoughts. Not making you sick.
I know I talk bad ass…. But if you just bear with it. You’ll see ‘me’.

Today is a friend’s special day. She’s one of a heck crazy. That’s why we’re friends. The reason why I love my friends.

Peace. Love. What the f***.
LOVE – I’m missing my mama and papa. So badly that I can’t pass a day without thinking if they were ok.

LOVE 2 – This is plainly boring. I just don’t get it how we end up liking someone who doesn’t like you back! Hmmm…. Maybe one day I’ll wake up without this weight hanging on my head and this knife stabbed in my heart. That’s the best thing to do. To HOPE.

PEACE – Seriously, I’ve lost all the peace in this world! Will peace exist in a life full of twist and turns? Will peace exist when you feel so unheaerted? Will peace exist when you see flaws bangin inside of you? PEACE comes when everything is calm.. When there are no more worries to worry about.


What on earth am I talking? Haha…

JEEPNEY LOVESTORY

Woot... finally the long wait is over! Jeeplovestory Music Video is out! Oh how i badly waited for this! :)) I'm a certified Yeng fan!



This video was actually produced by Yeng herself! So awesome right! I also love the cameo! woot super bigtime! Plus the leading man... Ivan Dorschner! :))

MYFIRSTIECEPGA

I don’t bother to wake up early every time there’s a gathering or some school events at our school, whether it was a major major (miss phil?) gathering or a “so-so” one. The thing is, I just can’t leave my bed. I’m too sleepy to resist the comfort of it. Especially too early in the morning. Anyhow, I will not continue my talking about how I usually end up coming late in every school events (include the regular class too…) that I must attend. I just want to tell that I’m so f***** late again, and this time dragging a friend name Julie who patiently waits for me just to reserved the pact that last night I was really really sure I will able to accomplished, and that is to come at school 7AM SHARP! And I am a SHARK on t! lol.

Everything was like in a fast forward. Check out Lhei’s place. While she was still in deep sleep. We rush in at Mcdo. Headed school. Guess what? , the rain wouldn’t want us to take the journey so easy! Gawd, it was raining so hard that we end up soaking wet! Char!


At the school, Gym to be specific.

Ok. So what is this place? So many people. Picture Picture. Waah what a nuisance scene. (don’t get me wrong, it is nuisance due to the fact that we always does it! Lol). There are so many participants in this so called G.A for IECEP. And so what do you expect from a first timer like me? Scream to death like where on earth I am? Of course that’s too much of your imagination, I just sit there and waited for the moment till I absorbed everything that was happening around me, including the countless number of people i saw. Things go well especially when some of my ever early bird friends showed up. (The fudge, I thought I am the one who rock on this late thingy, never thought I could be beaten up with my friends.. char!). And we did the part that I always enjoyed. Picture Picture. Then here comes program proper. Wow, I was really mesmerized by the superb natural talent of the host coming from BPSU. Ok, enough with sarcasm. Lol. Waah.. in my own opinion which is everyone is entitled, I think ate Tere (our IECEP president) could have done it better than the girl from BPSU. And oh, I almost forgot we’ve got a male host! Haha.. Ate BPSU’s ka-loveteam daw! Haha.. ok. Enough with ranting the hosts, I don’t know what will happen if I’m on there shoe…. Maybe I’m dead now. Chos!
Hmm.. what else… Oh yeah, the games. Oh sweet holy cat… I swear to God, if you ask me if I enjoyed it? Waaahh… I almost cut my hair! Why? Just imagine countless papers I need to sign up just to fill in the box that says, “Long haired girl from Columban College”. WTFUDGE.

BREAK TIME.LUNCH TIME. KIM SAVES US. LOL.
Thanks for the treat Kim, sana everyday birthday mo, para everyday libre. Char! 

Seminars.

Here’s the loveliest part. I can’t remember anything that had been discussed. Lol. I’m too busy thinking about how long it will last. Lol.
JULIE&KIMS FAVORITE PART. LETRAN BOYS PROD!
You can literally see the twinkle in their eyes seeing those cute boys from Letran. Haha.

RAFFLE.WHENWILLIWIN?
I’m so damn hopeless. Kulang na lang lahat ng santo tawagin ko na manalo lang ako, pero ang swerte ko talaga, sawi palagi. Dang!

FINALETHATROCKS!
It’s time to say babye to them. They’re going back home. And we must clean up all the mess that they leave to us. Sort like remembrance daw. Yes.. C2 bottles, mineral, chips achuchu… Yeah literally. I enjoyed cleaning up somehow, because it’s so easy when it is a team. (Aminin, may kasama pang showtime achuchu… magtutupi lang ng table cloth noh Kim? Chos!)




ONE ORGANIZATION, ONE PROFESSION, ONE FAMILY.
Yan ang sabi ng IECEP.

“WE SALUTE YOU”
Sabi ng Dean.

To end up, I would say I did enjoyed this event. Somehow it increases the heat of the fiery ECE in me. :)) To the organizers and to those who help and support! Kudos to all, you simply nailed it! Rockenroll! *clap-clap-clap* Goodluck to all of us worthy future Engineers! 

That would be all!



But I guess not!
Side kwentos:
After the event we went home. But I decided to buy something first. So we went our separate ways. On my way home, Julie texted me, “Dai hindi ko pa nahananap si –tutuutt Letran sa FB.” Guess what it was like 10 minutes ng maghiwalay kame. Eh sa tantiya ko, 7mins ang byahe pauwe. So anu yun Julie? Pagpasok sa bahay, sipa pintuan, internet, facebook, search si tutuutt agad?! Chos! Haha..

THE HIBERNATION PERIOD IS OVER, I GUESS?

*sigh* wow.. it's been like a couple of months since my last post... goodthing i'm saving some journals in the computer... So here's what I've got.... :) Ah... "emo-thing" hate it! But yes, that's what happen... Guess what? I'm a SURVIVOR! :)


-------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello. Wow, it’s been a long time since my last post here… Honestly I don’t know how to start this blog entry… I don’t know exactly what to say… I guess for the past weeks of May up to the first week of June, my life was in a roller coaster. Well I know that’s life. Damn. It was so hurtful. Now we’re still recovering. I’m still in a state of moving on.

May, it was actually my favorite month, basically because my birthday falls on the 25th of this month. A month usually full of celebrations like family gatherings, summer get away with my friends, my parents’ wedding anniversary and of course my birthday. Unfortunately May 2010 was the saddest.

I feel this kind of feeling before, pero iba pa rin talaga kapag hindi lang ikaw ang involved. This was like more hurtful than dealing with my own struggles in life. Because for me, what’s more hurtful is when you see your love ones hurting.

My mom, she always screams at me, saying bad things against me, she almost hates all the things that I want, most of the time she don’t understand me, I admit these things makes me feel so broken, but despite of all these things I love her so much.

Who wouldn’t have thought something unexpected will happen to her. She was sick; it hurts me more seeing her in a bad condition. We spent our whole month at the hospital, for a month it seems like a regular basis, waking up early at 7am and sleeping late at 2am. Oatmeal became my favorite meal. One thing, I celebrated my birthday also at the hospital, it was very unusual, yeah of course. Well aside from the environment, maybe because I wasn’t able to celebrate my birthday with the company of my friends but its ok, I feel so love because I was remembered on my special day. Actually I didn’t feel like celebrating at all, what’s the use of celebration if you see your mom in pain, it was a terrible experience, at that time I wish my birthday would be in another month.

At that point, I knew God was up for something, it’s not only about the pain, it’s more on “learning”…. Learning the lessons of life. I love my mom, with that I feel so rational to say, that after all these pains brought by some crazy twist in our life, my life, I’m still thankful to the lord. He was there when I needed him the most.

UPDATE 1
Hi there, this is so unusual… for the longest time I feel so damn sad. I know this is what you call self pity, how I badly wish I could escape this crap! But I feel so shuttered. My world is in slow motion, I can feel every heartbreaking seconds of it! That’s beyond hurtful! Everyday I find escape from simple things… like goofing around with some of my bestest friends…. I wish this thing called loneliness will leave me…


UPDATE 2
Yes, it was indeed a rollercoaster ride… guess what after a couple of days feeling lonely… a couple of days happy… here comes history again… Cliché again, but that’s that! That’s LIFE!

VLOG FOR MABUSHI DAY :)

Been busy these past few days.. so ngayon lang nakapagupdate... tsk tsk :)
damn... i look so crazy!! hate it! chos! lol.

a kinda mabushi day

LOL at the title. :)

I just want to talk about some mabushi (mabushi=bright)things i've got today. These are like the things that mostly i didn't expect to be existing today. haha. Today, as usual, attended my class. Gaah, kakaiba talaga today, i feel like listening to my instructor.lol. So after the class, yeah as usual we took a break at our "tambayan" duon sa tapat ng tindahan ni ate Merz. Ayun after a couple of kwentuhan ayun we got home na rin. Grabe i just love papa God :D I really feel mabushi! LOL.

PM

Ayun dahil sa walang integral class si Kim, the five of us, decided na maggala na lang. We all had fun! Haha.... ang kulit ni Von Jebemon. :) Well, its up to you to learn what is Jebemon. LOL. We first headed to Royal then stayed at the Lagoon. It was really fun! Omgee! Buhay nga naman noh, there are so many things to explore and to learn! Anyways that would be all i guess, besides i do have a paln to post a vlog for today..:D

BAISSSSSSS!!!!

Last April 24, 2010. The very first PJCATH Get Together was held! I wasn't able to attend the said event though *sadface*. I really wish i could go and have fun with them, but deimmmmm... i just can't go. But I'm so thankful with this "pasalubong"!





nice nice!! *happy face*


Kudos to Pj and Cathy! and most especially to all the people behind this wonderful get together! The ever wonderful Baissumeras! :) Superr thanks sa pasalubong! :)

BRET OF PBB

Omgee.. this is a special blog entry for Bret Jackson♥ of PBB's teenternational Housemates! Oh he is so awesome! Ok just to get you into the "what-I've-been-talking-thing", Well, uhm...Big Brother Philippines look for 'bed spacers' who will occupy the apartment house... and yun nga.. this so-called teenternational housemates will occupy the said house and one of them is the indie singer of USA, Bret Jackson! oh.. he is love. lol.



Aside from his dashing cutie look, he reminds me of Christofer Drew Ingle! (oh talking about my forever love for nevershoutnever!) lol. I'm so surprised about last night's episode! Omgee, he sung "can't Stand it"! and i think i started to like him much much much! :)

saw this too in Youtube!


go BRET! well i don't know, but maybe someday.. i will be "yourbiggestfan" (Nevershoutnever<3)